Funny Clean Jokes For Adults 134. A: He was all bite and no bark. Q: Whats the best thing about dating homeless chicks? Q: What would happen if you cut off your left side? Honeybee a dear and bring me a beer! Q: What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common? A: You spread its little legs. A: Slick her hair back and she looks 15… 78. Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning? One voice says, follow your desire. These jokes contains naughty words and phrases. Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snow man? Q: Why is being in the military like a blow-job? Q: What did Bacon say to Tomato? Q: How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Q: What did Dracula have for dessert? Q: What do you call a gangbanger behind bars? Q: What do you call 300 white men chasing a black man? Q: How many Sorority girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: Why do vampires scare people? Q: What do you call a ninety-year-old man who can still masturbate? A: Because they have cotton balls.
Q: What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common? ~~~~~ Q: What do boobs and toys have in common? We have all kinds of dirty adult jokes and some can be really offensive, nevertheless, we have made a compilation of some dirty jokes full of humour to amuse your dirty mindset. These nuggets of gold were diligently sourced for and not just randomly picked. Q: What does a good bar and a good woman have in common? A: None, they all sit in the dark and cry. Q: Why does Dracula wear patent leather shoes? Be aware that some of these jokes may be offensive for someone. Once upon a time two guys who knew each other well agreed that they would switch partners during a night. Q: What do you call a retard in a tree with a briefcase? We all love a good joke, especially those ones that can actually be shared with people. A: They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Q: What is heavy forward but not backward? Q: What do you call a boy who finally stood up to the bullies? Q: What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack? A: Worst case of suicide he had ever seen. A: I cry when I cut up onions… 30. ~~~~~ Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: A rabbi cuts them off; A priest sucks them off 43. Q: What happens when two vampires meet? Q: Why did the belt get arrested? Q: Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer? What do you call an extra page in the porn magazine? ~~~~~ Q: What do you call a guy with a giant dick? A: Because his pecker is on his head! Budweiser girlfriend walking funny 90. A man went home with a prostitute and while at his place he demanded that she should be covering his ears during the whole time.
Q: What gets wetter the more it dries? Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A: A lickalotopis 63. A: Oral sex makes your day and Anal sex makes your whole weak. A: He needed to get to the bottom! A: Because their plugged into a genius! A: When he eats his first Brownie. A: Because everybody who can run, jump and swim are already in the U. A: When you take it off you wonder where her tits went.
They just put it in, make some noise during 3 minutes, before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy. A: When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them 68. Q: Whats the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower? Q: Why are there only two pallbearers at a homeless guys funeral? A: They just give you a bra and say: Here, fill this out. A: A Quarter Ponder with Cheese. Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?. They were both stuck up bitches. A: A mosquito stops sucking when you smack it.
Q: Why did God give men penises? Q: Why are vampires like false teeth? Right when I came she screamed: whip me, bad boy, whip me. Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery? ~~~~~ Q: Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? Q: Why did Dracula go to the dentist? A: They both stick there meat in 10 year old buns ~~~~~ Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly? A blue whale shoots 400 liter sperm each time he cums. A: They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns 47. What do you call a goat that practices safe sex? Just make sure the kids are not around while you go through them. ~~~~~ Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: Pick him up and suck on his cock! ~~~~~ Q: What do preists and Mcdonalds have in common? Q: What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire with the internet? Q: What is a vampires least favorite food? Q: Why do they call it the wonder bra? A: Liquor in the front and poker in the back! The woman was used to many things so she just did what he had asked. Q: What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes? How does a Scotsman find a sheep in tall grass? Q: Why did Hitler commit suicide? We have made a list of funny jokes that will make you laugh out loud, strictly for adults only. We will caution children under 18 not to read anything under this section.
Q: What songs does Dracula hate? The inexperienced guy talks to his friend about his first encounter with a prostitute. Why are 60% of all men unable to sleep after sex? A: Kick his sister in the jaw. Here goes the list of funniest jokes for adults. Q: Which building does Dracula visit in New York? ~~~~~ Q: What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection? Short Funny Jokes For Adults 1. Q: What does a nosey pepper do? Q: What kind of bees produce milk? Ice cream if you touch me again! A: You can drop them off anywhere. Q: What is a vampires favorite holiday? Q: What has got two legs and bleeds? Q: What do you call a gang banger behind bars? If we lock the door we can try it out.
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel. A: Erotic is using a feather…. A: They both have special needs 37. Q: Why does the Easter Bunny hide Easter eggs? Q: What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah? Well, how did it go the psychiatrist asked. Q: What did the penis say to the condom? Q: Why do men like big tits and a tight ass? A: They both only change their pads after every third period! ~~~~~ Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? A: A Quarter Ponder with Cheese. Q: What do a guy and a car have in common? Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: They named him Sum Ting Wong. Q: How do you make a tissue dance? Q: How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Q: Who does Dracula get letters from? Dirty jokes are mainly directed towards an older audience that can properly enjoy them.
Men vacuums in the same way that they have sex. A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up. Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: Does this taste funny to you? Q: Did you hear about the guy who ran infront of the bus? Q: Why are crippled people always picked on? A: Another one bites the dust! We review each joke and then viewers like yourself can rate them on how funny and list of dirty jokes--you think they truly are. Q: Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? A: Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. Q: Why was the girl afraid of the vampire? Why do men always give their jackets to their women when they are cold? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? Q: Why do men get their great ideas in bed? The pharmacist then also pulls out his penis, takes the 50 dollars and puts them in his pocket.